I don’t know why I feel this way. I feel as if though the reasons are seeping in my body are because the weird conscious feelings I have for him are because I don’t know him. I don’t know what he’s like, I don’t know how he feels, I don’t know why he’s never talked to me, nor why I haven’t talked to him. I try to blink two times and say that the feelings for him that I have are disappearing like my thoughts, but it’s difficult. I stare at him like he’s an eye-magnet, trying to look away, but can’t. The feelings I want to go away are finally focusing and realizing as if though they are staying like super glue. I shake my head  and want to hide and cry, but the thought of letting him go away from my mind are focusing too, making me realize that I want them there. At the same time, I don’t. It’s as if he’s different from any guy I like, any guy that was there. When we’re just in the same room, even just fifty feet away, I feel as if though I stare at him over and over again. I want him to be jealous, I want him to want to talk to me, like I want to talk to him. I can see that he does may look at me a couple of times a day, when I look at him a whole bunch of times. I want him to see that he should just come over to me and say hi. Saying, ” Lisa, trip ____, ” isn’t exactly what I call enough in my world. That’s probably the first and only time he did and will talk to me, though. I want to say hi myself, but the thought of just being a feet near him makes me want to go scorching red and run away. It feels as if though my head is spinning and heart is pumping when I hear his voice. It’s not like anyones voice, it’s a perfect voice. I would nearly do anything in the world to just be able to have a five minute conversation with him without awkwardness. I wish that I had one more class with him, just maybe being able to hear his amazing voice and look at his amazing face just one more time a day. In terms of pushing myself, I’m nervous. The kind of nervous where you have to look away because you’re afraid that he’s going to come up to you and ask you why you’re staring at him and you know that you’re going to feel your mouth go dry. The thought, just the thought, of seeing him. Him seeing you…